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Joke of the Day

"How do you cut a Emo sandwich? Trick question, it cuts itself."

"My dream job? That's easy: Be one of those Muppets that sit up in balcony making fun of everyone. That's Old School Twitter."

"What's Bernie Sanders's favorite insurance company? Progressive *this just popped up in my head while in the shower. If already posted I apologize in advance*"

"Cilla Black has died... Surprise Surprise."

"If he calls you clingy, move in immediately without warning and decorate his bed with 57 throw pillows"

"Why was the blonde wearing condoms on her ears? Because she didn't want to get hearing-AIDS."

"Knock Knock ""Who's There?"" ""Dwayne."" ""Dwayne who?"" ""Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning!"""

"What do white guys have bellow their hips thats hard and pleasures women Credit Cards"

"Rape is not a laughing matter. Unless your raping a clown. (Probably been posted here a 1000 times but it still cracks me up)"

"A Priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar... he orders a drink."