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Joke of the Day

"Which of our meaty friends are into astrology? Those that are born under the sign of the Ham!"

"It's weird that my neighbors won't let me borrow their keys & make a copy of them in case I need to clean their house while they're asleep."

"How many ska kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? 4... one to drop it and three to PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP, PICK IT UUUUUUUP!!!"

"Beer commercials really overestimate how many attractive people live in my apartment building."

"Why did the computer programmer put his brownies back in the oven? They were too GUI."

"If you pour two beers in one glass, it's just one beer."

"I was raised as an only child. My siblings took it pretty hard."

"Put glitter on top of all your friends ceiling fans blades. Wait til spring Enjoy"

"My next door neighbour just confronted me about her clothes going missing from the washing line .. I nearly shit her pants"

"[Dog Restaurant] ""Is the Book Report any good?"" Yes, Sir. ""How's it prepared?"" A 9yo stayed up till 3am to finish it. ""Ooh, I'll have that."""