36874

Joke of the Day

"You're so beautiful I can't describe it with words.. but numbers can. 3/10."

"When one door closes another one opens. I should really get this cabinet fixed."

"The letter E is used frequently and infrequently."

"Aliens are taking people with . . . . . . .Big Dicks! Dont worry you are safe! Im just telling my favourite alternative news site that i wont be around for a while!"

"What do you call a polish guy on a boat? A fishing pole"

"My sister wanted to marry a man clever enough to make a lot of money but dumb enough to spend it on her !"

"I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me, she said yes - about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes."

"I'm single by choice Not my choice though, every girl I've ever asked out's choice."

"What's Irish and stays out all night? Patty O'Furniture."

"I was watching the film, 'A Perfect Murder,' with my wife She told me she was getting scared. ""Is it the storyline?"" I asked. ""Not really,"" she replied. ""Stop taking notes."""