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Joke of the Day

"Executive: What should we name the mutant with neato magnetic powers? Me: [clearly joking] How about Mag-Neato? Exec: damn that's so good"

"I have now stolen 56 copies of the board game ""Risk"" from local retailers. When they eventually catch me, I'll say ""Life is all about taking Risks."""

"What do you call the field of study for dad jokes? *Sigh*ence"

"Do you ever have to fart But end up shitting in your sisters mouth?"

"It's a comfort knowing Dad is looking down on me, but we should probably cut his hang-glider out of that tree one of these days."

"what's the deal with ""airplane food?"" newsflash, jerry: it's called jet fuel."

"What app do nervous ppl order on dates? Chicken Tinders."

"Dear Reddit, what your least favorite punchlines? Whoops, wrong sub"

"Instead of a blue or pink balloon for a gender reveal.. A piggy bank should be smashed revealing $1 for a boy or 78 cents for a girl."

"I got into a fight with a baseball player. It wasn't too bad. All I did was strike him three times and he was knocked out."