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Joke of the Day

"The bassist walked past the bar."

"CRIMINAL: You can't arrest me if you can't see me. BABY COP: God damn, I wish I understood the concept of object permanence."

"Why was hitler's suicide such a suprise? Because we did nazi it coming"

"*takes a hit off the joint *slowly exhales Ahhhhhh This is the best baked sale ever ""It's a BAKE sale"" *exhales again Tell me about it"

"Why did the black med student wait all day at the rear entrance of the student cafeteria? Because his professor told his class they were going to spend the entire next day at a bacteria conference."

"Knock Knock* Who's there? Me open up."

"Talk to your kids about drugs. Maybe they have better connections than you."

"Why are alcoholics the same as necrophiliacs? When they feel like fucking death they crack open a cold one."

"Anyone who's ever stood in a busy McDonald's line at 10:29am not knowing what to get has been closer to getting murdered than they realize."

"When I was young, I played the triangle in a reggae band. I just used to stand at the back 'n' ting."