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Joke of the Day
"Why Wasn't Jesus born in Italy? They couldn't find 3 wise men or a virgin."
Next Joke
"Such a sad day - a friend of mine died of heartburn Still can't believe Gaviscon"
"What's big but small? A midget's ego."
"When my wife picks a restaraunt that I don't like, I just say ""oh yeah, that's where that really cute girl works"". Problem solved."
"sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium Batman!!!"
"Imagine yourself, you just woke-up on the street without pants & underwear, with sperm dripping from your derriere, would you tell anyone? No? So what are you doing next weekend?"
"3-year-old: *dumps Cheez-its on the floor* Me: What are you doing?! 3-year-old: Feeding the Roomba."
"My Girlfriend My girlfriend is an epidimiologist and I'm a stand-up comedian so that means I have a lot of chores I have to go do. Later."
"Whats the worst thing about dating a terrorist? Doesn't matter if you come or not, they're getting blown anyway. Thought up this at work"
"I remember Daddy told me fairy tales can come true so any time an old lady offers me an apple or cookie I kill her and bury her in the woods"