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Joke of the Day
"How did the emu feel when his friends disowned him for being too big? Ostrich-sized."
Next Joke
"Did you know that Trump is 6' 3""? I guess that means that Trump Towers."
"The knowledge that Jersey Shore is known as ""Macaroni Rascals"" in Japan may just be the most important of my lifetime."
"me: *buys condoms, tampons, lice shampoo, adult diapers, yeast infection cream, an enema and a pregnancy test* cashier: would u like a bag"
"I wrote a short story about some angry fruit... Its titled ""The Wrath of Grapes."""
"I'm more comfortable hearing my five-year-old repeat swear words in public than I am hearing him say ""uh-oh!"" from another room."
"Is it so much to ask that everyone who ever wronged me be forced to leave the country and change their identity?"
"I like my women how I like my coffee Cheap, easily picked up And found later in a disposable plastic container."
"What does a redneck garden gnome hate more than anything? Transplants"
"Why did the traffic light turn red? You'd turn red too if you had to change in the street."