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Joke of the Day

"How many Mexican reposters does it take to make me mad? Just Juan"

"My mind is made up... I'm Frankenstein."

"I rather have a bottle of soda for President than Donald Trump. This way, we could truly have a Liter of the Free World."

"Wife: every time we argue, you think you're right. Me: yes, because if I thought you were right, I wouldn't be arguing..."

"Q: Where does Napolean keep his armies? A: In his sleevies!"

"""Great, now we're looking at luggage. Not like we need more luggage."" Me, 11/25/2015"

"The Spicy Sausage by Delia Katessen"

"ME: Too much turkey makes me so tired HER: Actually, it makes you sleepy, not tired ME: I'm getting real sleepy of your shit, Debra"

"When Eminem, wrote Recovery, obviously he wanted to Recover. Akon wrote Freedom, because he wanted freedom. And Justin Bieber wrote boyfriend, hhmmmm......"

"Why does everyone care who Tom Brady voted for? What we really wanna know is who Ja Rule voted for. WHERE IS JA?!"