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Joke of the Day

"This question is only for the fellas: You ever kick back in your man cave and think about what a strong feminist ally you are?"

"I'm not on the Atkins Diet. I'm on the Rowan Atkinson Diet... It's all BEANS!!"

"Cop: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: SCARLETT JOHANSSON"

"Pirates used to wear eye patches because they had hooks for hands"

"This guy says to me, ""Your girlfriend looks like a man"" I said ""Your girlfiend looks like a man too: the invisible man!"""

"If by ""unload the dishwasher"" you mean take out clean utensils as I need them, then yes I unloaded the dishwasher."

"What have men and spray paint in common? One squeeze and they're all over you."

"How come Miss Piggy couldn't talk? She had a frog in her throat."

"What's the difference between a feminist and an archangel that dislikes Biblical prophets? One is a Dan-hating Mike. The other is a man-hating dyke. edit: spelling because of anal dykes"

"I like my TVs like I like my women Curvy."