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Joke of the Day

"I can't wait for thanksgiving. It's an election year so that means there will be at least 4 fist fights and someone's getting disowned."

"Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense"

"What do you call an ugly Spanish chemist? Iron Oxide"

"ME: forgive me father for I have sinned PRIEST: nothing that can't be forgiven my son ME: I microwave my pop tarts PRIEST: u sick son of a"

"Press reporter asks NASA director 'what did the kepler telescope find out today' ? Water on Mars."

"Say what you want about the Make-a-Wish foundation At least they can work to a deadline"

"Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb."

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9"

"I like my women like I like my cars ...All black and twenty eight hundred pounds!"

"""hey mister can i pet your dog?"" ""sure kid"" ""what kind is he?"" ""that there's a pure beef vienna son careful don't get mustard on your shirt"""