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Joke of the Day

"Star Wars newest Droid..... How does the newest round Star Wars droid relieve his sexual tension? He master-BB8's"

"How do you know your wife is getting vat... ... you have to switch off the light during sex. Not because she's ugly but because the bulb burns your ass."

"Why do jihadists drink instant coffee? Because they hate the french press..."

"What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Walking"

"How do you know when it's midnight at Neverland Ranch? The big hand touches the little hand."

"For people who've been around such a long time, grandparents seem constantly amazed that children grow."

"I was offering free mammograms in the company parking lot long before my employer was doing it."

"What's better than roses on a piano? Tulips on your organ."

"How can you tell if a man is sexually excited? He's breathing."

"What do Porsche and Apple have in common? New product, same design."