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Joke of the Day

"If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the entire country of Australia for 44 minutes."

"She'll be coming around the Mountain when she comes. - Mountain bragging."

"What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women."

"Different religions can be really strict about adherence to their principles. I hate anal sects."

"If God hates gays so much, why didn't he put it in the ten commandments? Instead he's more pissed that you're jealous of your friend's PS4"

"Girl wins a watch ""Mom, the old man down the street told me that if I sucked his dick he'd give me THIS WATCH!"""

"Doctor doctor I feel like I'm part of the Internet! Well you do look a site"

"Chicks love guys with tattoos cuz it means they're willing to commit to something stupid for the rest of their lives..."

"The hardest part about coaching Little League is remembering not to say, ""MOTHERFUCKER FIRST FUCKING BASE GODDAMMIT SHIT!!!"" all the time."

"""I couldn't work there after what he said to me..."" ""What did he say?"" ""You're fired."""