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Joke of the Day

"What do Japanese Kids, Chinese Democracy and German Humor have in common? All are equally oxymoronic."

"Half the time, I just want to respond to an ELI5 thread with ""I'll tell you when you're older."""

"""Don't dip your pen in company ink."" - HR training seminar explaining why I shouldn't sleep with the receptionist...I think."

"Robin Thicke is what would happen if a roofie became a human and decided to make music."

"From the list of things you should not be cheap about: pens, chairs, prostitutes, coffee, and dentists."

"That awkward moment when u lock binoculars with your neighbor."

"""Yeah let's clone some sheep cause dinosaurs would be too awesome."" - Scientists."

"What's black, covered in teeth marks and no longer in use? Philip Seymour Hoffman's belt."

"What do you call an immigrant without green card that can't see Illegally blind"

"Failed a urine test... took a shit :("