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Joke of the Day

"Someone should start an organization called People for the Unethical Treatment of Animals. They'd all be knows as a bunch of PUTAs"

"Why did Hitler's Bed'n Breakfast fail? The only thing he served for breakfast was concentrated juice."

"""Your days are numbered!"" - inventor of the calendar, joyously announcing his accomplishment"

"""Yo momma is so ugly, I had to invent a device that allows me to converse without looking at her."" Alexander G. Bell"

"I can make a movie with my hand. All it takes is a FLICK of the wrist!"

"women secrets? Scientists have now discovered how women keep their secrets. They do so within groups of 40."

"Major Tom: This is Major Tom to Ground Control I'm stepping through the door & I'm floating in a most peculiar way GC: New phone. Who dis?"

"What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country."

"*Submits synonymosaur as an alternate word for thesaurus *Waits for Nobel Peace Prize"

"What do you call a group of chickens dressed up like crows? A murder most fowl. (I'll see myself out...)"