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Joke of the Day

"I update my Facebook picture to a jail mugshot over the holidays so my family will go visit someone else."

"Life hack: ask telemarketers and phone scammers to go steady seconds into the conversation and never be bothered again OR now you found love"

"Black and Blue Whats black and blue and doesnt like sex? The six year old in my trunk!"

"Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is dead."

"Have you heard about the old wheel that got a new image? He retired."

"i made the starbucks guy say large instead of venti I HAVE ALREADY CONQUERED WEDNESDAY WHAT NOW"

"I was looking for hours for my thread on Reddit.. Turns out I was browsing with the popular filter :("

"What do you call a top-ranking Mexican dude that oversees everything? Senor Manager"

"After being diagnosed with a multiple personality disorder, I phoned my boss to tell him I'd need time off. ""You're self-employed you stupid bastard,"" I said."

"My girlfriend made a call during sex... She let me know she was having a great time and she'd be home soon. Thought that was sweet."