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Joke of the Day

"yo mama joke I got a yo mama joke thats almost as stupid and ugly as yo mama"

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"Did you know that the Coast Guard is the only branch of military with a minimum required height of 6feet? It's so if their boat sinks they can walk to shore."
"My 16yo daughters boyfriend struggled with a capri sun for the last 10 minutes. I think it's ok to leave her alone with him."
"Why do Scottish men wear kilts? Sheep can hear zippers."
"The other day, I went to www.conjunctivitis.com ... Now *that's* a site for sore eyes..."
"Children are for life, not just for benefits... Credit: A sticker on the back of some guy's car"
"When your prospective father-in-law asks:""Why do you ask for my daughters hand in marriage?"" Do NOT say:""Because I am tired of using my own"""
"Old age is nothing but a computer with 1000 GB of memory running on a celeron processor"
"To all the single people this Valentines weekend Go fuck yourself ;-)"
"ME: I'm gonna plug my Twitter handle. WIFE: Please don't. ME: I'm gonna do it *walks to the microphone in front of the funeral*"