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Joke of the Day

"WHY IS ASS RED BECASUE MY DAD WALKED THROUGH THE DOOR AND FUCKED MY ASS TILL IT WAS RED YOU FUCKING RETARDS"

"What did the tie say to the hat? You go on ahead, I'll just hang around here."

"And your 2015 Miss Universe is Columbia! -Steve Harvey"

"If you ever see me on my death bed, please take me off my death bed & move me to my alive bed thx"

"What do numbers look like when they get divorced? 96"

"My apartment is so dirty that I actually lost my last girlfriend to the 5 second rule."

"Why did the bee started talking poetry ? He was waxing lyrical !"

"What does a former CIA agent who leaked classified information and the city of Boston have in common? They're both snowed in."

"My in-laws are visiting... This is their homicide note."

"Roses are red, here's something new... Violets are violet. Not fucking blue."