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Joke of the Day

"Why are muslim charities the worst to donate to? Because they are for prophet."

"Why doesn't Mexico ever win any medals in the Olympics? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim has already crossed the border."

"On a cold, late December day... ... the wall calendar looked across the room at the advent calendar and said: ""It looks like our days are numbered, pal""."

"How good are the showers at Auschwitz? They're to die for."

"I bet all three Pigs had a great education, but the Pig that lived in the straw house probably had a ponytail and a neck tattoo."

"I used to work at an orange juice company But I got canned because I couldn't concentrate."

"An Elvis impersonator had to cancel a show because he got some terrible family news. He was all shook up"

"I can remember my first day at school The teacher looked at me during register and asked, ""Are you chewing?"" I said, ""No, chewing is probably one of the foreign kids, my name is David."""

"Is your dad retarded? Because you're something special"

"Men live better than women. First of all, they get married later and secondly, they die earlier."