2524

Joke of the Day

"For two years in high school, I took guitar lessons. Something interesting I learned is that guitar resale nets a 45% loss."

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"What do you call Japanese pussy? Yellowtail"
"Best amputation jokes? Friend has bone cancer, may be getting an arm amputated. We have run ""I'd give my left arm"" and ""Single-handedly"" puns into the ground, and we need more amputation jokes."
"""I'M GOING BANANAS!!!"" ...is what I tell my bananas when I leave the house."
"The scene in lady and the tramp but as our lips meet I carry on sucking. You feel the pasta travel back up your throat. My pasta My. Pasta"
"It's really only a matter of time before Lady Gaga gets Justin Beiber pregnant."
"There is no more cake. This is my suicide note."
"What is Donald Trump's favourite nursery rhyme? Barack a bye baby"
"My biggest fear is that someone will say ""Git-R-Dun"" while I'm holding my child. Because I will instinctively swing my baby at their face."
"Hilary Clinton will make the best president She will save us 25% in salary right from the start."