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Joke of the Day

"Astronomers got tired of watching the moon go round the earth for 24 hours, so they called it a day. I'm sorry. Edit: FFS guys it's a ruddy joke. It doesn't have to be scientifically accurate"

"There's so many things trendy now that haven't been popular for a century now... Beards, suspenders, home-births, natural produce, measles..."

"How did the homeless handicap child die? Alone"

"Why can't Miss Piggy count to 100? At 69 she always gets a frog in her throat."

"Wife: He's always lying about his celebrity connections.. Therapist: Is this true? Me: Just wait til Sonic The Hedgehog hears this bullshit."

"what does a sneeze see after it dies sneezus"

"How can you spell too much with two letters? XS (excess)."

"You know they've had sex change operations for men for a while now, right? Well they just recently started offering sex change operations for women, too. It's called the ""addadictomy""."

"How do you know you're at a gay BBQ? All the hot dogs taste like shit."

"Holy Kleenex, Batman! He was right under our nose, and we blew it!"