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Joke of the Day
"Why did the boy like doing trigonometry? Just cos."
Next Joke
"This Viagra show looks cool but they keep cutting away to football"
"My wife calls it ""woman's intuition"" but I call it ""not clearing your browser history."""
"Why was the washing machine laughing? Because it was taking the piss out of the knickers."
"Alfred: About your girlfriend Catwoman... Batman: Yes, she's a thief, but- A: No, she pooped on the rug again. Right next to the litter box!"
"If pro is the opposite of con, what's the opposite of progress."
"Company suspends sponsorship deal with Sharapova after she failed drug test To protect Volkswagen's excellent brand image. They can't affiliate with people who might have cheated."
"A jumper cable walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, ""I'll serve ya but don't start anything."""
"I measured my penis today and it said 11.7 inches. Then I realized the ruler was backwards. Credit to /u/TodoJaw21"
"Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?"