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Joke of the Day
"What really ticks people off? Time bombs."
Next Joke
"[Creation] God: These dinosaurs are ruining the place! Angel: Maybe they'll evolve? G: *throws a rock* A: Sick shot! G: Next time, apes"
"What do pirates have in common with photons? They both travel at c"
"Cinco de Mayo means five of mayonnaise in Spanish."
"[At supermarket] ""Excuse me do you work here?"" WHAT? ME? Work HERE? Hell no. I went to college. I don't have a job"
"Even though I know its wrong. I don't know whats right... Damn math problems!"
"Why can't muslims eat pigs? Because the Quran forbids cannibalism"
"I was suspicious that big multinational chemical corporation was up to no good, but then I saw that green cartoon leaf in its logo. Whew!"
"It's a SHOT in the dark, but you might find this funny. Why did the bros take a shot of alcohol together? Because if one bro takes a shot, the other takes a slug! #Bromanceforlife #Dietogether"
"""R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to pee"" - Urethra Franklin"