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Joke of the Day

"What do pirates have in common with photons? They both travel at c"

"There's a fine line between being tan and looking like you were rolled in Doritos."

"5 and I are playing ""guess the number I'm thinking of"" with no limits and no clues. He's guessing sequentially from 1. Talk next week, guys!"

"What did the fish thief say to the cops when he turned himself in? I gillt was killing me."

"My wife told me she'll leave me if I go blind. I guess I'll just have to see."

"The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"What do you call a Mexican garden hose in Canada? Joseh"

"Did you hear about the man who choked on his lasagna dinner? He pasta way."

"My first child will be named New Folder."

"Boss: go to hell Me: so stay? or leave? I'm confused"