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Joke of the Day

"The road to hell is paved. That's nice."

"If I had a dollar for every time someone told me I am handsome I would have exactly one dollar.! Thanks Mom.!"

"How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying ""Aww, how brave."""

"MAN: See my tattoo? It says ""Only God can judge me."" GOD: That shirt with those pants?"

"Did you hear about the guy that got shot in the back of the head in a movie theater? He was sitting in front of pee wee herman."

"I was gonna make a joke about the internet... But Why Would We need it"

"I would tell you a nun joke.. .. but it's nun-appropriate."

"I have a fantasy that a big strong man shows up at my door, comes in unannounced & slowly, quietly & methodically renovates my bathroom"

"What does Snoop Dogg eat when he visits Germany? Schiznitzel."

"There is simply no need to add ""NSFW"" in your bio. This is twitter. None of us have jobs."