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Joke of the Day

"What did the zero say to the eight? Where'd you get the cool belt?"

"I was going to tell a dead baby joke... But some people don't get prop humour."

"Does anyone have the number of a painter/decorator? I really need to get all my windows jammed so they never open again."

"I don't understand why ISIS is such a big deal. All we have to do is parachute in Chuck Norris, and within a month they will all be dead... It can't be done faster since he fights with his bare hands."

"Woman of my dreams I don't sleep so I can't find her!"

"what did 0 say to the 8? nice belt"

"I'm not allowed at the gym anymore because I dropped my chili dog on the treadmill"

"There is a fine line between a sleepover and just drinking way too much at someone else's house."

"Whats the difference between a Rolling Stone and a Scottish man The Rolling Stone says, ""Hey you, get off of my cloud."" and the Scottish man says, ""Hey McLeod get off of my ewe."""

"So I woke up this morning to my dishwasher making a weird sound.. Turns out she was just vacuuming."