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Joke of the Day

"My problem is that I keep stealing things when I go Christmas shopping. Can you give me something for it! Doctor: Try this medicine...and if it doesn't work come back and bring me a new video camera."

"What is the car company, Kia's, main competitor? Nokia"

"Joke said by my little sister ""Why shouldn't you give Elsa a balloon?"" ""Why?"" ""Because she will let it go"""

"Two guys decided to rob a Calender from a Calender store They each got six months"

"If straight people use Tinder, what do Germans use? Hitler"

"What do you call a stillborn grizzly cub? Unbearable"

"Teacher: Are you good at math? Pupil: Yes and no Teacher: What do you mean? Pupil: Yes I'm no good at math!"

"How to get laid: Step 1: Be an egg Step 2: That's literally it"

"I remember when I discovered Santa Claus was just my dad I still don't know how he snuck out every year to deliver presents all over the world."

"M: If I cashew looking through my windows agai- H: What? M: I saw you pecan! H: No, I wasn- M: You're macadamian me mad. H: You're nuts."