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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a Chicken and a Prostitute? The Chicken says ""Cockadoodaldoo"" The Prostitute says ""Any COCK will do"""

"Who is better? The 3rd wave feminist or the pencil? The pencil is better. It has a point."

"Do you remember that programme about the surfing stuntman? It used to be good but now it's jumped the shark."

"If Isaac Newton discovered gravity Why isn't he in the credits? (Crossposted from /r/shittyaskscience)"

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue on his coffee? He drank it before it was cool."

"What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? A strongly worded reprimand from the university's board of regents, and an immediate withdrawal of your funding."

"No wonder Satan hates humanity... We draw him as the ugliest goat alive"

"What did Hagrid say to Harry Potter after Harry had a mishap with some potions? ""You're a lizard Harry!"""

"I was just diagnosed with colorblindness... I was so surprised, it just came out of the green!"

"I told my dog to heel... So he went to the hospital and did all he could."