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Joke of the Day

"Two utensils are laying in bed... One turns to the other and says ""wanna spoon?"" The other replied, ""no, I'd rather fork."""

"This guys car is stopped in the middle of the hwy with his flashers on. Probably thought of a really good tweet."

"Winner of the coin flip at Superbowl 50 announced earlier today. Hilary Clinton has decided to receive."

"Ban land mines now! It's time to put our foot down."

"A sitcom about teen girl aliens called UFOMG."

"Boss: Are you drinking liquor at work? *flashes back to pouring apple juice into a whiskey bottle bc I couldn't find a thermos* ""Yes"""

"What did the scientist say before he died by mixing Hydroxide and Nitrate? ""OH^- NO^3+ !"""

"When Fnatic plays on fy_snow... OLAFmeister gets an ace"

"Golfer: ""I'd move heaven and earth to be able to break 100 on this course."" Caddy: ""Try heaven. You've already moved most of the earth."""

"everyone on the saturday night live thing pronounced it sarynyelive"