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Joke of the Day

"""Piece of cake"" should not mean ""Easy!"" It should mean ""Delicious!"""

"We're supposed to lose all the trees by 2020 but if we work hard, we can make it by 2018."

"Why didn't Spock do a mind meld with Frodo? Because he figured that would be a bad hobbit to get in to."

"I blink one eye at a time because flying squirrels can attack at any moment."

"To the guy who just followed me with ""Conservative, God-loving, pro-life"" in his bio... are you sure you want to do this?"

"What is Mozart doing right now? *Decomposing*"

"The cannibal nervously decided to try his first human meal Much to his dismay, he got cold feet"

"If Trump wins the election *Orange* is the new *Black*"

"There aren't that many casinos in Africa. Cause there are too many cheetahs. And if you meet one who claims he isn't a cheetah, he's probably lion to you."

"TIL Humans eat more bananas than monkeys. I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey."