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Joke of the Day

"So a man wins an argument with his wife..."

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"How do you make a little girl cry even more? You wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear."
"Q: What do you call that great feeling of satisfaction you get when you finish your homework? A: The aftermath."
"What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The Wheelchair."
"I always wear black. That way I'm ready, at any given moment, for an impromptu night out or your funeral, whatever."
"What noise did the dumbbells make when they were dropped? ... Dong-Ding."
"What did the viola say to her daughter before crossing the street? You better C^ or you'll B^"
"Contrary to popular belief, Stalin was from Georgia, not Russia. Stalin wasn't Russian anywhere."
"What do you call a Greek Magician? Abra Kebabra"
"How do Protestants like their orange juice? without Pope"