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Joke of the Day

"Scientists have discovered the number one food that kills a woman's sex drive Wedding cake"

"This kid who wants 'two front teeth' for Christmas is full of shit."

"What is dill bread made from? Dill dough."

"How did Dairy Queen wind up pregnant? Burger King didn't wrap his Whopper"

"In 2017, every TV show's marketing plan will be to add a Trump parody character so he's compelled to watch & cry on twitter about it."

"""How do we spell this pasta?"" L ""Ok"" A ""Got it"" S ""Neat"" A ""Diggin it"" G ""What the hell"" N ""Wait"" A ""I have some questions"""

"Who comes in the fog? Seamen."

"As a quiet and skinny person, I feel like we should charge loud and fat people more to ride the subway. It won't be difficult to implement either. All we would need to do is charge them by volume."

"diet tip: your pants will never get too tight if you don't wear any."

"I ran out of toothpaste recently So I've resorted to brushing with soap. It's pretty gross, but on the plus side I've really cut back on my swearing."