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Joke of the Day

"What does a sperm cell have in common with a lawyer? Both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being."

"What does Harambe order when he goes to a restaurant? He gets the kids meal."

"How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One."

"I met a Russian homosexual today His name was sir gay"

"Predator taking off his mask, but it's me removing the filters from my selfies."

"Nuts. When you have nuts on the wall they're called walnuts. When you have nuts on your chest they're called chestnuts. When you have nuts on your chin you're called a cocksucker."

"Where do you find the hottest Jews? in the ovens"

"My New Years resolution is to not make a New Years resolution. I figure I am going to fuck it up anyway... I may as well do it from the start."

"9/11 was a national tragedy. So is 11/9."

"Why is Santa Claus's sack always so full? Because he only comes once a year"