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Joke of the Day

"I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle."

"Who would win in a fight between John Cena and Chuck Norris? Depends on who wrote the script."

"I was doing some curling in the gym when some guy looked at me funny. I said, ""What's up, punk?"" ""Nothing,"" he replied, ""I've just never seen a man using hair rollers before."""

"Did you hear what they called the new dog breed from Israel? The Penny Pinscher"

"A hot girl goes to confession She says ""father, I had sex out of wedlock"" The priest says ""pics or it didn't happen"""

"72 What is 72? 69 with 3 people watching!"

"Why is it called PMS? Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken."

"""Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it."" In which case, there sure are a lot of amnesiacs on this subreddit."

"Do you know why lions eat raw meat? Because lions don't know how to cook."

"What is Ke$ha's favorite candy? TicTac"