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Joke of the Day

"I read a book on anti-gravity... I couldn't put it down."

"Marilyn Monroe sure got smart four decades after she died."

"I asked a terrorist how his day was going... He said it was great, his son died in a car bombing. The only problem? His son borrowed his car."

"What do you call an empty jar of Cheese Whiz? Cheese was."

"I told her she has a nice ass. As a lady, she looked at me like my mom didn't raise me right. But we all know she'll smile about it in the ladies room."

"What do you call a diseased duck? A Mallardy."

"How do you get Reddit to go ape-shit? Tell a domestic violence joke."

"Want to hear a joke? Windows vista"

"I had a friend buy a European car and he kept telling me about it breaking down. I had to tell him that I didn't want to hear anymore of his Saab stories."

"My mom asked me to sit indian style... so I pulled out a bar stool."