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Joke of the Day

"I got an email from Olga. She thinks I'm sweet & ""longs for finding a special person for serious relations"". So there's always that."

"What do you call a slice of bread from another country? An immigraint."

"Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking about retiring? He decided to stick it out for another year."

"How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster? On a piece rate."

"A woman steps into a time machine She goes back 10 minutes so she can add less sugar."

"What's the worst part about being a redneck? Having to see your ex at family gatherings."

"[The mid 20s catch up] ""What are you drinking, who you seeing?"" [The midlife catchup] ""Who's your therapist, what are you taking for it?"""

"Me: Hello darkness my old friend Darkness: I have a boyfriend."

"""Is that a banana in ur pocket or are u just happy to see me haha"" [i pull a hand full of lasagna out of my pocket] ""Actually it's lasagna"""

"They're working on a series in which Bob Odenkirk is the star... It's called Better Call Sol."