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Joke of the Day

"How did Dr Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster? On a piece rate."

"What do you call a midget Mexican? A paragraph, because he's too short to be an essay!!!"

"Why was the ladybird kicked out of the forest? Because she was a litter bug."

"ROUGE ONE SPOILERS!!! Screen fades to black at the end and a bunch of names start scrolling up."

"Two men are running and they pass a bar Eventually the get tired, and stop. They then agree that they need more than two people on their relay team."

"Hashtag. A game you play in the quad of any state college..."

"My daughter's school was closed for fog. Back in my day, Godzilla could be destroying the city & the principal would be like ""2-hour delay"""

"What's the best thing about dating a black girl? You'd never have to meet the father."

"My favorite deleted scene from Lord of the Rings is when Bilbo & Frodo discover they have a long lost hipster cousin called Douche Baggins."

"When I'm mad at my kid, I don't put the straw from the juice box in their school lunch."