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Joke of the Day
"What goes; green-red-green-red-green-red-green-red? A frog in my blender"
Next Joke
"*gingerly maneuvers the garbage can back into place between a stack of crown molding we'll never use and your antique pesticide collection*"
"When I was growing up plastic surgery was a bit of a taboo subject... These days if you mention Botox no one raises an eyebrow."
"By not having a 160 character limit, we are missing out on all the good tweets that have 141 through 160 characters. It's science."
"What's the difference between my penis and a midget dressed as a mouse? Both are small and scare women away... :("
"A football team should setup a charity that gives presents to children with Down Syndrome ...and call it Touch Downs."
"Everyone buries their problems in different ways. I bury them alive because killing people is wrong."
"Nothing says ""I don't take you seriously"" like your dog wagging his tail when you are yelling at him."
"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny."
"Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make Then they call me ugly and poor"