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Joke of the Day

"My cell phone fell in the pool...now I know what it feels like to have someone you love drown."

"Don't you hate jokes about German sausage? They're the wurst!"

"Glad my parents spent 100k on my education so now I can type ""c u @ 2"" to my pot guy."

"What has a bottom at its top? A leg."

"I thought a drone was the sound women make when you're trying to watch the game?"

"I knew someone who was frozen to absolute Zero once... He was 0K"

"new kitten So I decided to teach my kitten to write. You might think it was pretty hard but he took to it easily. Before long he could do anything I could do.. Turns out he was a copy cat :)"

"What do you call someone who blows himself up by accident? An Errorist!"

"Two wires at sea Two wires were on an ocean cruise when the ship sprung a leak and sank. The solid core wire managed to climb into a lifeboat and head to safety. The other was stranded."

"6: Dad, why do you have so many nicknames for me? *I break down, no longer able to cover up that I can't remember my son's name"