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Joke of the Day

"Passenger: Will this bus take me to New York? Driver: Which part? Passenger: All of me of course!"

"What do you get if you cross a student and an alien ? Something from another universe -ity !"

"I get caught zipping my pants up while standing beside the turkey just one time, and suddenly she never needs help in the kitchen anymore"

"My favorite word is plagiarism. I invented that word."

"I feel bad for people without arms... ... They can't rapidly take off their bottoms when they need to take a massive dump."

"Did you hear about the man who got sick at the airport? It was a terminal illness."

"I think I'm done clapping for stuff. It's enough already."

"Do you like fish sticks?"

"If you get in the mood to do some work, someone will always wake you up."

"What did the painter say to her boyfriend? ""I love you with all my art!"""