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Joke of the Day

"[Phone with Mom] ""Did you just friend request me?"" I'm on fb now ""I'm not adding you"" Fine do your own laundry then *accepts friend request*"

"Software boner. Why did the computer need Viagra? Because it had a 3.5 inch floppy disk."

"When I see someone in public talking on a bluetooth..I like to position myself on the other side, lean in & whisper ""It's ok I see them too"""

"The hardest part about online dating... Finding someone who clicks with you."

"I got really drunk on St. Patty's Day last year and took the bus home. That may not seem like a big deal to you, but I'd never driven a bus before"

"Why did the laptop memory have such a hard time in school? Because he was SO-DIMM!"

"What do you call a gay rock. A fruity pebble."

"1.Why did Sara fall off the swing?? 2.Knock Knock 1.She didn't have any arms!! 2. Who's there? NOT SARA!!"

"White people don't shoot each other in the streets like black people do... We shoot each other in schools, because we have class."

"Have you ever wondered where they got the name ""Canada""? C, eh. N, eh. D, eh."