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Joke of the Day

"Have the day off when the SO comes home, ""Have you been on reddit all day!?"" Look at the clock, ""Not yet."""

"I never really understood porn. I mean what does she really see in him? I doubt he even loves her."

"Why did Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia never get together? Because Luke was looking for love in Alderaan places!!"

"*Slides a five across the bar* Bartender: Did you... Did you break this off our sign out front? Me: (Confidently) tap water please."

"Boeing 787 The Boeing 787 Dreamliner has had so many leaks from the fuel and oils on board that they are re-naming it the Wet Dreamliner! C.H."

"Best politically incorrect joke you have heard ?"

"Engineers To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, some idiots used a glass that's twice as big than necessary."

"A Halloween Limerick A lady vampire named Mable Had a period that was awfully stable. So once a full moon She took out her spoon And drank herself under the table."

"Context is Key She's so coy. Is she part fish?!"

"Climb mountains not so the world can see you, but so you can see the world."