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Joke of the Day

"Putting captions in the wrong place You know what I hate the most...?"

"*sticks hand into jean pocket* Aw damn, why in the hell do I have bbq sauce in my pocket? *checks other pocket and finds nuggets* Oh, ok."

"If you were to wrap a cloud as a gift, what would you wrap it with? A RAINBOW!"

"Closing time, son ""Huh?"" You don't have to go home but you can't stay here ""But I live here Dad"" *Dad stares at me* Don't forget your Xbox"

"It's not Wingardium Leviosa It's Wingardium Leviosah-Dude"

"My first joke here and an original! Did you hear about the two lawyers who set up shop under the old oak tree? I heard it was a pretty shady business."

"Why don't ants get sick? Because of their tiny little anty bodies"

"This will be the fifth year in a row that my in-laws will come over for Christmas... I think this time, we should let them in..."

"I tried some Dirty Dancing in a neighbour's herb garden. I had the thyme of my life."

"How do you greet a British programmer named Cathryn? 'Allo-cate"