28718

Joke of the Day

"What's the quickest way to get to the airport? Terminal Velocity. [:D](http://instantrimshot.com/index.php?sound=rimshot&play=true)"

"When a girl tells u about her favorite animal - ""I'd eat one"" is not the right response."

"I told my wife she would look pretty bald if she were bald."

"Justin Trudeau announces free lazer eye surgery for all Canadians in 4 years... When asked why he put forward this proposal, he responded by saying ""because it's 2020""."

"Jeb Bush just tweeted a picture of a gun engraved with 'Gov. Jeb Bush' with the caption 'America' At least he'll never have to get it re-engraved"

"Balloons think they're so cool. I tried to tell one he was leaking and he just said, ""Pfft."""

"What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt. ....... Ba dum chhhh!"

"who said that girls don't have a good sense of direction? they sure know their way down."

"Bears can swim, climb trees, and open doors. Why aren't there ""BEWARE OF BEARS"" signs posted fucking everywhere?!"

"Floppy disks are like Jesus... .. they died to become the icon of saving."