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Joke of the Day
"Spent most of my early twenties trying to open a pistachio."
Next Joke
"All it takes is a ""food dreadful, service poor"" Yelp review to get your mother-in-law to stop inviting you to Sunday dinner."
"A boy asks for a pink ping pong ball... a boy comes downstairs and asks for a pink ping pong ball. ""don't you start that again."" says the mom."
"What do you call a group of singing killer whales? An orca-stra."
"We won't know we've truly made it as a society until computers in movies stop making beeping noises"
"If you dont sin, Jesus died for nothing!"
"me: [performing autopsy] so I've been practicing my ventriloquism assistant: now's not the time corpse: aw come on"
"I like my coffee like I like my women... Hot, dark and bitter."
"Anaconda Funny Joke I was watching anaconda on my laptop then my parents walked in.... I just switched to porn it was easyier to explain"
"What do you call a white supremacist who fights aliens at night? A white power ranger"