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Joke of the Day

"I went to the gym the other day... ...I asked the instructor could he teach me to do the splits. How flexible are you? He asked. I can't do Tuesdays. -Tommy Cooper"

"If Bernie hates the 1%... why is it that only they vote for him?"

"The FBI's terrorist hotline is not a place to chat with hot terrorists. I know that now."

"The most dangerous room in the house really depends on where your wife is at the moment."

"Why is it Windows 10 and not 9? because 7 ate 9."

"What is Donald Trump's favorite music album? The Wall"

"What are Mario's overalls made out of? Denim denim denim."

"What's the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? One will see you later; the other one will see you in a while."

"Whoever coined the phrase ""Quiet as a mouse"" has never stepped on one."

"Do you know how electricity works? The truth may shock you."