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Joke of the Day

"Good news, you survived the horrific car crash. Sadly we couldn't find the other guy's arms but we managed to reattach all four of yours"

"Tonight I'm going to have my favorite drink. It's called ""a lot."""

"So did you hear Buckwheat from The Little Rascals converted to Islam... He now goes by Kareem O' Wheat."

"Might love you quicker if you bring me more Liquor."

"I used to think I was a fast reader And I was quite proud of it until I heard about these so called ""9- 11 Jumpers"" who went through over 100 stories in 10 seconds ...Incoming repost comments"

"Why did the Earth suddenly enter a manic episode then go back to a depressive episode? Because it's bipolar."

"What would a Chinese person never eat, but a Mexican regularly eats incredulously? Pan *duh*"

"Did you ever see a country boy in New York whistle for a cab? He puts two fingers in his mouth and hollers ""Taxi!"""

"I bet my fish rolls his eyes when I tell people on the phone how busy I am."

"The number of things that are *not* rocket science is staggering."