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Joke of the Day

"I hate Russian dolls... They're so full of themselves."

"My Wallet My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry :-("

"Where is the safest place to stay at Ferguson? The public pool, if it is too crowded try the library."

"So if Lucy died 3.2 million years ago after falling from a tree... ...does that qualify her for a Darwin award?"

"How many Apes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one... but it takes a shitload of light bulbs."

"What do you call an angry Reddit mod? [deleted]"

"Did you hear about the woman who had her left side cut off? She was alright."

"In dog beers I've only had 2."

"Today's rappers are lame they're unable to walk normally because of an injury or illness affecting the leg or foot."

"The most diverse software company in the world consists of 100% black lesbian single mothers missing a body part, with arts degrees"