28004

Joke of the Day

"Who's the most popular guy on a nude beach? The one who shows up with a dozen donuts and two cups of coffee."

"Why didn't the sun have to attend university? It's already got thousands of degrees."

"I loaned a blind guy some money... It's ok though. He said he'd pay me back next time he saw me."

"Remember to check on your elderly neighbors to see if they have anything worth stealing."

"Dark comedy is... Like water.......not everyone gets it."

"If you met an eel in a top hat... ...that would be Sir Eel. (say it out loud)"

"Which stretches further, skin or rubber? Skin. It says in the bible, Moses tied his ass to a tree and walked 10 miles."

"What did Michael Jackson almost name his daughter? Nata-LEE-HEE!"

"Where do conspiracy theorists keep their ideas? In a skeptic tank. --- (Note: I just made up this joke earlier today. I'm not 100% sure the joke is obvious; feel free to suggest a better wording!)"

"The moon landings looked more realistic than Hillary's rally last week. And those were faked with 1960s technology."