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Joke of the Day
"If you're not one of the first five boys in the yard, you almost never get a milkshake."
Next Joke
"My small child told me his opinion on politics and I disowned him for being a nerd"
"What do you call martial arts for cows? Mooey Thai."
"My roofing business is having a great promotion right now... If you buy one roof, the next one is on the house."
"[in bed] Her: Easy, cowboy. I'm not having unprotected sex. Me: No worries! Her: Where are you going? Me: To lock the front door. Her: ..."
"What is the media of choice for the mallard? **DUCK TAPE!!!** lololololololol-- *cough cough* --lololololol"
"What do you get when you sleep with all 140 characters of twitter? A rashtag."
"Why do they say cleanliness is next to godliness? Because every time i talk dirty to my wife she tells me to go to hell."
"What do you call a Jamaican squid? Calamarley"
"What is the sexiest type of dolphin? A striped tease dolphin."