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Joke of the Day
"My small child told me his opinion on politics and I disowned him for being a nerd"
Next Joke
"Me: I'm happy right now. Life: lol one sec"
"2 walruses walk into a bar.. the first walrus is swearing and acting extremly obnoxious, the second walrus turns to him and says ""tusk tusk"" Gotta love dad jokes"
"My teacher asked me what a main feature of a greek tragedy was.... Apparently Bankruptcy was the wrong answer."
"You matter Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared. Then you energy."
"What do you call a funny fungus? A pungi."
"I went camping with my family for the first time. It was in tents."
"I wish my best friend would leave his cheating whore of a wife. Then I wouldn't feel so guilty for sleeping with her all the time."
"""My date took me to a nice restaurant. Our server leaned in to me and said, ""You're the third one this week"""
"When I go to Starbucks, I tell them my name is Marco. When my drink is ready and they call my name, I just keep saying Polo."